Man, that banner is like a sleek Accelerator jersey. Black on black baby.
Bruins come into Pittsburgh on a three game winning streak after a shootout win against the Senators where Boston comes back from 2 down. It was a tough game for Boston, which doesn't bode well for their legs against the Pens. The only thing that helps Boston is that Malkin is back in Russia sucking down some tiger blood...or whoever this whore is:
Don't get me wrong, I think Malkin is awesome and Jon has a little Russian scud missile in his pants for him, but that 1,000 yard stare he has going on should make anyone worried. I guess you can't tell if he is just dumb as rocks or its his concussion creeping back in and he's pulling his best Marc Savard impression (Savard concussion mention #1).
But the Bruins can't take this team lightly. Sure, they're the NHL's poster child for the most bi-polar squad to ever hit the ice - and yes, they couldn't kill a penalty if you tied the penalty up to a chair and gave the PK a bazooka - and yes they have Marc Andre Fleury in net who is either Patrick Roy or that fat kid who is put in goal during recess because he takes up 3/4th of the net but moves like a slug covered in salt.
You never know if you're going to get the MAF who pitches a shutout or the Ilya Bryzgalov-esque Fleury who lets in 5 goals (2 of them soff).
But then you realize they have Sidney Crosby and he's the best in the world. Seriously, let's call a spade a spade here. The dude is good and isn't the crybaby most teams like to make him out to be. The guy leads the league in points and assists and because of him Chris Kunitz is second in the NHL in goals.
Chris. Fucking. Kunitz.
(stick tap to Fitz)
In a shortened season, Chris Kunitz is about 9 goals off of his career best from a normal 82 game season. The fucking guy has two hattricks already this season. You don't think that's a byproduct of playing with Sidney Crosby? You think this 33 year old winger magically sprouted a scoring touch over the elongated offseason?
It's because he's the mother fucking wingah fer Sid everyone in Pittsburgh keeps looking for. Or its because Sid makes everyone around him better. He's like Jesus, except that Jesus didn't have to sit in a dark room playing Mario Kart with Chris Pronger and Marc Savard (Savard concussion mention #2) and I bet Crosby takes King Boo.
Savard probably takes Princess Peach
Pronger probably takes Bowser and just tries to the the other two off of the road and then is like "Guys, I didn't do anything" in whatever language a troglidyte like him speaks in.
When you look at the numbers, Pittsbugh is Pittsburgh. They're first in the NHL in scoring with 3.65 goals per game (though I'm sure that 6 spot on the Islawlender didn't hurt) and they're 21st in goals against at 2.92. Basically, they're an incredibly talented offensive team that has trouble stopping anyone or anything from entering them. They're a Kardashian sister. Great to look at, easy to penetrate. Why?
Their goaltending blows.
Flower has 13 wins, but ranks 40th in GAA (2.71) and 46th in SV% (.902) in the NHL. Basically, MAF gets between the pipes and prays that his team scores 5-6 goals per game because he can't carry them on their backs. Those league leading 13 wins are a sham. It pisses me off when people bring up a goalie wins as a real stat. Goalie wins are like wins for a pitcher in baseball, they don't mean anything.
I'm not even getting on this tangent yet because...
After the jump, preview...
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