No 'Grinding Gears' this week... Greg got eaten by a Zombie Yeti. True story.

It's games like tonight in which we have to thank the Hockey Gods for aligning the stars (no pun intended) just right.

Andrew "The Razor" Raycroft vs. Tuukka "Two Us, Two Ks, Two Points" Rask.


For those who need a refresher... the Bruins traded Raycroft to the Maple Leafs for Rask. This is just one of the most recent steals the Bruins have gotten from the Leafs. In fact, Rask went as Raycroft for Halloween last year.


Really... the Maple Leafs are just the farm organization for Boston. Toronto sucks. Hockey elitists bitches.

Bruins are hitting a tough four game home stand. We'll see the type of character the team has post-ASG.

Some people are calling the Bruins-Stars a great rivalry. We're assuming they're saying this because of the Great Bruins-Stars Brawl of 2008. One line brawl doesn't equate to a rivalry. The Bruins-Habs is a rivalry. The Penguins-Flyers is a rivalry. Bruins-Stars? Not so much. They see each other like one a year -- it's more like a family Christmas party than a rivalry.

That doesn't mean that tonight's game isn't important. Rask usually gets no D or O help and the Bruins are home (which they've struggled).

Photoshop Expo!!
We just realize we have no Andrew "The Razor" Raycroft photoshops beyond the above Raskcroft. Send us your best ideas or images to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . We need to load up.

Of course, we can't forget about Little Bitch Steve Ott. What a tool. We kinda hope he starts shit just so Boychuk or Thornton can lay some smackdown. If only Savard was around to throw some punches. Send us photoshops of Ott, too. Add a comment

Brad Marchand is doing an autograph signing at the New England Picture store next week. So, one would think they would spell his name right. Right?

Wrong.
 

We're not sure who this Chad Marchand fellow is. Perhaps Brado's twin bother? Evil twin?

Sad thing is it's been like that for a quite a while now. You'd think the page designer would have looked at the graphic and saw that it said "Brad" and not "Chad." Or, you'd think the NEPS would have notice the error and changed it by now. It still says Chad. 

Who wants to email Eric and let him know?  Add a comment

Now, we're not the type of guys who like to brag but...... oh wait, yes we are. Patrice Purrgeron is now 2 for 2. If you recall, back in December the Bruins were playing some wildly inconsistent hockey. Anyone who says they were happy with the Bruins play is a liar and a tramp. So we sent Patrice Purrgeron on a mission to find the Bruins heart. He did, and since then the Bruins have looked like a different team.

Then over the All-star break Patrice Purrgeron worked with Horton to restore his confidence. Horton Watch 2011 had been going on for 29 days. On the day Purrgeron released his report on Horton's confidence building exercises, Horton scored.


Coincidence? We think not.


But hey, what a way to start of the push towards the end of the season. B's started off sluggish. Thomas held the fort long enough for the Bruins to find their legs and crack Cam Ward. Timmy "Two Points" Thomas was the star. Again. Bergeron come through. Again. What else is there really to say. Bruins are rolling. Hopefully they can keep this up.

After the jump..... Cam Ward is good, Tim Thomas is better and Carolina fans can't live without Jeff Skinner........

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Purrgeron doesn't like to toot his own horn (that's a lie), so we'll do it for him.

Every time we put Purrgeron on special assignment he's come through.

We saw it when Purrgeron risked his own hide to find the Boston Bruins heart.



And now we saw his skills in action tonight. Horton Watch 2011 was reaching ungodly numbers, so Purrgeron stepped in and coached Horton during the All-Star break, pro bono mind you.


What happens?

Goal.

Coincidence? We think not.

Purrgeron has decided to expand up his business and is taking requests on other issues -- be it personal or Bruins related -- to possibly take on.

Send ideas his way via his Facebook profile, the DOY Facebook profile or emailing Patrice at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . Add a comment

Nathan Horton is in a slump. That is quite obvious. Why do you think we started Horton Watch 2011?


After starting the season on a tear he has cooled considerably. Most nights lately we completely forget he's on the team until we either say "Wow Horton just missed way wide" or until Jack Edwards says his name. He's been practically invisible.


So where is that Horton we saw earlier this season? He hesitates on shots. Passes when he should shoot. Misses wide. He looks lost. Did he lose his game? Did he lose his confidence? Is there anyone that can help him find it?

In times like these, there's one man we can turn to. He's got more game than Milton Bradley. He's got so much swagger and confidence he makes Hugh Hefner look like that nerdy kid in your high school science class.

To help Horton find his confidence and game, we turned to one man who is so complicated that no one understands him but his women....


After the jump, Patrice Purrgeron takes Nathan Horton under his wing to try to restore his confidence.......
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We've known Maple Leafs fans are a bit iffy in the sanity column for a while now, but we were still dumbstruck when we read PuckDaddy's post about Leafs fans and media thinking Phil Kessel was picked last in the All-Star draft because he's on the Toronto Maple Leafs.

Apparently this grand conspiracy was started by Nick Kypreos his crew over at Sportsnet.ca.

This entire video is nuts.


Is weed legal in Canada because that's exactly what these assclowns were smoking. Holy hell.

"Toronto's market can ill afford to take any more hits. Leaf fans already know where they stand on the scale of respectability, and a Leaf being picked last is another shot at a once-storied franchise. Watching Alex Ovechkin taking a cell phone picture as Patrick Kane announced "with the last pick," you start to wonder how many around the league quietly enjoyed Kessel's humiliation" --Nick Kypreos

The fact that the Canadian media needs to go and defend Kessel for being picked last in a meaningless puff-show game just shows you 1) Toronto is off it's fucking railings and 2) How big of a pussy Kessel is that people need to constantly blow him to make him feel good about his situation.

We're going to let you in on a little secret on why Phil Kessel was selected last.

Because he's fucking Phil Kessel. Why can't people just admit that no one likes Phil Kessel? He's a tool. He's lazy and thinks he's 10x better than he actually is.

Here's another reason why Kessel was probably picked last in a game designed for his type of play.


Zero points. Three shots. A +1. This in a game where there was 21 goals. He's making Horton look good.

Leafs fans are lucky Kessel was even picked for the All-Star Game.

But since Leafs fans are so keen on conspiracy theories on why their beloved team sucks and why Phil Kessel was picked last in a dumb draft, here's one:

Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke is a Boston Bruins operative.



That's right. The Leafs front office leader is actually on Jacobs' payroll. In fact, Burke is a robot secret agent being control by Cam fucking Neely at the Boston Garden. Why else would he trade all those juicy draft picks on an under-performing, unlikeable winger?

Here's an idea, Toronto. Get over yourself. You're not that special and neither is your team. Phil Kessel sucks. Nothing else to it. No one likes him. You don't even like him. You just pretend to like him because he's on your team. Trust us, we know. We did the same thing when he was playing for the Bruins. We lied to ourselves about liking Kessel.

But no one likes Phil Kessel. And that's why he was picked last in a meaningless game.

Suck it, Toronto.

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Finally, the All Star Break is over and real hockey has returned... and wouldn't you know it, we're playing the team who's Guardian was the hero of the All Star Game. Thank god the Hurricane was there when the rest of the Guardians were caught by Devlin Dark...

God god, it sounds even stupider when I type it. We used to trust you Stan Lee! I'm switching to DC Comics!


Moving on, the Bruins are finishing off their series against the Canes tonight.  In the past three games, the Bruins are 2-1, and outscore Carolina 10-5.  One of those games was a 7-0 violation of the Hurricanes, which  Mr. 105.9 and his massive slapshot had a lot to do with. 

Doing our best to not make an inappropriate "Chara's rocket" joke...
Carolina is just one point out of a playoff spot, so if they have any brains at all, they're going to bring their A+ game tonight and it'll be nice if the Bruins pick off right where they left off before the All Star Break rather than hide behind Thomas. 

After the Jump: Roster, Video, and more links than you can shake a stick at! Add a comment

Our man-crush on Johnny Boychuk is well known. Everything from Boychuk Facts to Super Boychuk proves it. We couldn't deny it even if we wanted to.

And so we bring you, dear readers, a new Boychuk photoshop -- one we had hoped to turn into a t-shirt until we realized we'd probably be sued by the Boston Bruins and Johnny Boychuk's agent for trademark, copyright and likeness infringement. 

Nonetheless, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy it as, say, a computer background.

We present: Three Boychuk Moon.

Click here for the full-size image.


Copyright notice: You try stealing this image and we'll sue and kick your ass.... unless you're Johnny Boychuk. Just sayin'. Go Bruins. Add a comment

Ryan Hudson over at Boston.SBNation sent us a link of his featuring some promo photos of Zdeno Chara and Tim Thomas at the All-Star game.
 


With all that sparkling, we figured they were auditioning for the Twilight saga. 



Vomit.



Luckily, this only happens in our nightmares. Twilight sucks.  Add a comment

Days of Y'Orr crew is having a busy, but interesting weekend. Went to a Shawn Thornton autograph signing and got Justin's Shawn Thor(nton) picture signed. Thornton got a kick out of it. Then we told him he was the third greatest NHL player of all time again and he thanked us for putting him ahead of Gretzky. He jokingly said we might be a bit demented if we believed that but he appreciated the notion. Thornton is a super nice guy. Seriously, if you ever see him at a signing he's great. Very friendly, especially to the younger fans, and doesn't mind idiots like us.

One of the Days of Y'Orr staff members was on the same hotel bus as a Minnesota Wild scout. A discussion about Phil Kessel was had. Hilarity ensued.

Tonight is the All-Star game. Greg has already made our feelings abundantly clear in regards to some of the festivities going on.


The "Fantasy Draft" aspect was intriguing and fun in some ways. Hilarious that Phil Kessel got picked last. He can say whatever he wants but we know that in at least some small way it bothers him. Can't believe he even got picked for the game. He's not even the best player on his team this season. 


The draft also saw the Sedin twins get split up and Chara and Thomas ended up on different teams. Thomas is probably looking forward to shutting down his teammate.

One of the many, many awesome things about Tim Thomas is that he goes all out in everything he does. Watch when he's in net today. All the other players will be coasting around because its a meaningless All-Star game and Thomas will be playing his balls off. It gets personal when someone scores on him, no matter what game it is. And that is why we're pumped about the Bruins Cup chances. We're just looking forward to real hockey resuming again.

After the jump.... Thomas falls, Chara blasts and we get ready for those stupid Guardians......

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